Moody Haiku

Ever had one of those days? One of those funky, moody, blue days when you just feel out of sorts? A day when even a counter full of homemade fried pies can’t seem to snap you out of it (so you KNOW you’re really in a funk)? I don’t know why, but I’ve been feeling funky. And when I feel funky, my mind goes to weird places. Like haiku. Don’t judge. I don’t shake my head or wag my finger when you eat peanut butter from the jar with your fingers. Do I.

In the tradition of 5-syllables then 7-syllables then 5-syllables, here’s where my mind went yesterday. And don’t even think about stealing these little pearls. Some day, they’ll be published (on a bathroom stall somewhere).

Oh lovely bacon,
you beguile me as you lay
on my BLT.

Grey hair – yes, down there;
the drapes and now the carpet.
{sigh} Growing old sucks.

"The Complete Package"
He says that's his wrestling name.
He does not wrestle.

"Someone shrunk my pants!"
she declared as she ate pie.
Oh snap. That was me.

Boston Terriers:
I love their smushy faces
And sweet, warm snuggles.

I have a new bike.
It takes me on adventures.
And makes my butt numb.

"What's for dinner, babe?"
“Go make yourself a sandwich.”
“Wow. I feel the love.”

I love barbecue
and ice-cold Dr Pepper.
I’m a Texas girl.

Hey, tailgate driver:
if you’re gonna hug my butt,
introduce yourself.

Okay, guys – it’s your turn. Throw your best or worst haiku at me. I could really use a chuckle. But couldn’t we all?
-NanaBread

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29 Comments

Filed under Miscellaneous Thoughts

29 responses to “Moody Haiku

  1. big sis

    My night was shitty
    I didn’t sleep very well
    Today’s going to suck!

  2. Linda

    Jeanne, you’re so cute,
    You are full of laughs and grins
    So glad you’re my friend!

  3. Teresa Silverthorn

    I didn’t sleep well, either. Wow.

    • What? Three of us? Now it just reeks of conspiracy.
      Or are you menopausal like my sister and I, Teresa?
      Because that could be it, too.

      • Big Sis

        It’s just my luck
        that not sleeping really sucks!
        Menopause is such a bummer
        I’ld like to run her over with a Hummer!!!

      • Technically not haiku, but I’ll take it.
        Let’s see what the spambots do with your hummer reference.
        (Dear Spambots – It’s a vehicle. Get over it.)

  4. Teresa Silverthorn

    Does that matter? My husband hasn’t slept well lately, either.

    Is he menopausal, too? lol

    • Well, I certainly can’t vouch for your husband’s sleeping patterns, but no – it really doesn’t matter. Can men suffer from sympathetic menopause? Is that a thing? I wish we could share our hot flashes with them. They would FREAK. OUT.

  5. prairiesummers

    The hug my butt part made me laugh so hard I almost choked on my pie haha

  6. Teresa Silverthorn

    Pie?

  7. Hope your wonderful Haiku brightened your mood for you. Certainly made me smile.

    • Thanks, Paula. It did. Now I find myself watching for tailgaters so I can look in my rearview mirror and say, “And your name is …..???” And I’m avoiding pie (until my pants fit again).

  8. beard scruff makes me swoon
    i will have him forever
    forever. sucker.

    Next weekend I’ll get to see Ben and finally kiss that scruffy bearded face. Oh I can’t wait!

    I hope you bust out of your funk soon. These are some pretty wonderful haikus there, woman. :) XXOOX!!

    • Loved the “I’m getting married this summer” haiku, Megan. Especially that last line. Thanks for the giggle. I’m already feeling better. The haiku helped. Sometimes you just need to laugh a little. Hope you have a wonderful weekend with Ben. Make sure he blocks that farmer’s phone # so he can’t wreck your plans again. Safe travels!

  9. The Baby

    For your blog…

    Oh funny sister.
    Strangers becoming good friends.
    All because of you!

    For you…

    Hot flash sweaty sheets.
    Find me something good to eat.
    Mess with me and die!

    The tailgate one was my favorite!

    • Hahahaha…. oh, baby sister.
      I read the first one and thought “that’s so sweet!”
      Then I read the second one and thought “okay; that’s kind of true.”
      Thanks for the chuckle. As always.

  10. Craftiest #4

    Thank you for the musings. I’m glad your brain wanders off on occassion.

  11. Kat

    Haiku is The Art Form in my opinion. My favorite ending line as a pup was We Are All Friends Here. It goes with…so many things. That being said, it’s not yet 7:00 AM and my creative brain is off.

  12. Claudia

    In all honesty
    Oliebollen are damn good
    But I love you more

    :-)

  13. I have no Haiku.
    My brain has ceased functioning.
    Brain fart rages on.

  14. Bamaboy

    I asked for warnings
    When posting about “down there”
    Threw up in mouth, ewww…

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